


Interlude

by Gingersnapped907



Category: Major Crimes (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Shandy, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2018-01-25
Packaged: 2019-03-09 03:23:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13472676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gingersnapped907/pseuds/Gingersnapped907
Summary: A Shandy fic. Set at where the summer finale ends. How will Sharon deal with Andy's health issues and him not telling her how bad they are? Each chapter is inspired by a different song. It's angsty but please bear with it or me until the end. I really am a Shandy Shipper!!





	1. Chapter 1

~I Will Always Love You~

A/N: This idea was inspired by the summer finale episode. I also wove in the words from the song "I will always love you." Written by Dolly Parton, sung by Dolly and Whitney Houston. I also added some lines from one of my favorite movie musicals The Best Little Whore House in Texas. Such an angsty but happy ending in that movie. Who wouldn't want to be swept away by Burt Reynolds? Oops, I think I'm showing my age;)

Disclaimer: I own nothin' of Major Crimes. Sadly, nothin'!

Definition of Interlude:  
1: a usually short simple play or dramatic entertainment  
2: an intervening or interruptive period, space, or event: interval  
3: a musical composition inserted between the parts of a longer composition, a drama, or a religious service

'I will always love you.' Those words should have made him feel ecstatic but instead, they caused his heart to break.  
Andy had been getting released from the hospital and was looking forward to going home. He knew Sharon was busy with work and hadn't been able to see him yesterday. She had only been by to see him once the day before. She had stopped in on her way home from work. He didn't know where all this was coming from, but if Andy knew Sharon, and he did know her very well, then she had been putting too much thought into what had happened to him. She was probably a little freaked out at the moment. What she had told him played over and over in his mind. It wasn't something he would soon forget, if ever. He could tell from her voice that it was coming from a dark hurt place inside of Sharon.

These last few months were starting to take a toll on her until she finally broke. He knew it would happen. Andy had been trying to be there for her, but there were things she was holding back. For one, they didn't see eye to eye on killing Darnell. 

Andy thought it was one less scumbag idiot on this earth. He told her she had done the right thing by stopping the moron before he killed more people. However, Sharon was feeling more guilt for not feeling guilty over shooting a human being, for killing someone's son more than anything. The conflict of it all was tearing her apart. He had tried to help, but he couldn't get her to talk to him much about it. She did seem to be doing better after going to confession. Though after what she said to him today, he knew she was taking everything upon herself, and now he was paying the price too.

Thinking of what happened earlier sent Andy's thought there once again. He could hear her voice echo in the sparse hospital room. "I can't do this. I'm sorry Andy, I'm glad you are feeling better but I can't do this anymore. You knew something was wrong that day in the office and I'm sure you knew the day or days before that, and you still didn't say anything. I've been through this before with Jack, with him keeping secrets and look where that got me."

"So that's it, just like that?" Andy asked as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"A pinched nerve? Did you think I didn't see you hurting? I was just waiting to see if you would tell me. Being sneaky, that's much more you. Don't want me to worry? We've been over this and I'm not asking you to change, Andy. Just involve me. Don't keep things from me because you think I'd worry. How did that work out? I'm worrying a lot more now." Sharon walked from wall to wall of the small plain white cold room pacing; she couldn't look in Andy's eyes so she watched her steps. "I know you don't have a place to stay since you sold your house, so Provenza said you could stay with them or Nicole has room."

Andy was trying to recover from the shock and hearing his daughter's name caused his head to snap up quickly as he asked shocked and a bit annoyed that Sharon would involve his family in their personal matters. "You talked to my daughter about this, about us?"

"Yes, Andy, Nicole, and I talk a lot. She's a great young woman. She doesn't know exactly what's going on. I mentioned that it would be a good chance to have some father-daughter time." Sharon got back to the matter of why she came today by saying, "I've put in for the promotion that Chief Pope has been bugging me about." She laughed a nervous laugh. "I didn't get Commander like he had promised years ago, guess I might skip right up to Assistant Chief."

"Congratulations Sharon." Andy's voice was solemn as he said, "they are suggesting, strongly suggesting, that I take medical retirement."

"I know I heard that from Chief Pope." Sharon looked at him sadly then nodded, "I agree you should take it, or they will have you sitting behind a desk until you do retire. Andy, this is your third health incident now at the LAPD, two of them within months of each other. I'm not sure you'll ever be cleared to go back into the field."

Andy shook his head and with a bit of snark in his voice, he asked her, "Do you even care what I do?"

She could hear the contempt in his tone but understood where it was coming from. "Of course I care about what happens to you, Andy. I always will. I just can't..." She couldn't say it.

"You know this is your choice, Sharon. I will do what you want. I'll be out of the office for another week anyway, so we won't be seeing each other. After that, I can get the rest of my stuff from your condo." It hurt Andy to say her condo since he had really been feeling like it as home to them both. He guessed it was just something else he was wrong about.

"I had it all packed up. Rusty took it to Lieutenant Provenza's last night." She wouldn't look at him as she replied.

"Well then, I guess you made your choice already. Sharon, maybe when you aren't feeling so hurt we could talk?" Andy sat up straighter in the bed, he was dressed and ready to leave but there was no reason to move since he had to wait for another ride.

Sharon paced the chilly room again with her arms crossed in front of her creating an armor to help let her say what she needed to say. "Andy, we did talk after your blood clot remember. You were dizzy and not feeling right but you didn't tell anyone. Then you fell hit your head causing the blood clot to move that much closer to your brain. You almost died that day, Andy. Do you not understand that? It almost killed me to see you like that, to see your blood all over Rusty. You promised me that you wouldn't keep secrets from me anymore. Secrets kill a relationship."

He lowered his head with a frown. Andy knew she was right. He had once again kept important information from the woman he loved. Though he did it not to worry her, his good intention didn't matter. He had messed up a good thing. He knew he would, it's what he always did. If things were going well, leave it to ole Andy Flynn to somehow find a way to screw it up and things were going really well with Sharon. Until now. He tried one last tactic, "it turned out to be only angina brought on by stress and anxiety."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" Sharon paused her pacing and stared at him in disbelief. Did he really not hear what he was saying? Maybe she had to explain how that made their situation worse. "Andy, how long have you been with the LAPD?"

"A long time, I'm sure you know exactly how long. It's all in my file that you've gone over thoroughly in your IA days. Why?" Andy asked confused.

"Why because in all those years, have you ever had stress or anxiety brought on by the job or home life?" Her arms were now crossed over her chest waiting for his answer.

He smirked at her question, not sure where she as going with it. "Of course, I've had stress, everyone does. Sharon, what are you getting at? What does this have to do with us?"

"Enough stress to cause this?" She tapped her own chest with the palm of her hand. "Even when you were drinking or going through marital problems? Maybe going through your divorce brought on chest pains?" When Andy shook his head, she answered out loud for him. "No? Oh so did battling your ex-wife for the right to see your children ever cause stress and anxiety so bad that it put you in the hospital for days?" Sharon's voice got deeper with each word she spoke. "Can you at least answer me?"

He could see where she was going with this and hesitated to answer but he said quietly, "No it didn't, but Sharon I still don't see…"

"Me," Sharon poked her chest hard, "it was me. You didn't have any of these problems until we got together. I'm the catalyst for all your worry and health problems."

Andy couldn't hold back any longer and loudly said, "Sharon, no! You can't really believe that. Anyways, I had high blood pressure and passed put before we dated."

She held her hand up to stop him, "but not before I took over the division. I put too much burden on you right from the beginning. Even on that first day, you had to go against your team and longtime friends to have my back. That was the start of it all."

"They just needed to give you a chance, to get to know you. That's all and see how well it's all worked out. We are a family."  
Andy said trying to hold in his frustration.

Sharon continued as if Andy hadn't spoken. "I've been making you wait for years. That couldn't have been easy. It must have been hard for you, dealing with a woman that was so into her own life. Someone so completely self-absorbed in her own problems that she couldn't see what she was doing to her best friend. I didn't even know we were dating for a year. A whole year, Andy, not until my son pointed it out to me. I now see all the hints you tried to give me over that time, but I never got them." Sharon started her steps again. It was hard to stay still when she needed to get so much out.

He watched her begin to pace again and told her honestly, "I didn't mind. It meant I got to spend that much more time with you."

Sharon knew Andy would try and talk her out of it, but she had to convince him that this was best for him. "Then there was selling your house and looking for a new place, with none that we could agree on. Except for one that you're beautiful, young and blonde realtor Heidi died in. I was relieved that the house had toxic mold. I always put off moving forward because I panicked that we were moving too fast, even after we have known each other longer than most marriages last."

"Sharon, you are piling everything in one lump. All that was spaced over time." Andy tried to explain why for her. "It was time I was willing and happily giving you. It didn't add worry to my life, you've only made it better."

"Next stress. Us actually living together." Sharon couldn't stop the smile as she thought of the time shared at their, no her condo. With a shake of her head to clear her mind and get it back on track, she continued, "as nice as it has been. It's still been hard to adjust to. We managed when you were injured before but there was no intimacy involved then. We were focused on getting you better. Now..."

Andy stood up to protest but got dizzy and had to hold on to the rail at the end of the hospital bed. Sharon was quickly coming to his side but he waved her off. "I'm fine." He said gruffly. He was getting mad, but when he looked at her watery green eyes he could see that this was costing her too. He stood up straight and stated, "I beg to differ here, Sharon. We might not have been sleeping together but we were committed to each other by then. A relationship doesn't have to include sex to be intimate." He stepped closer to her as he added, "that has never been my goal. I've always wanted more than that with you. There was something deeper, stronger between us."

Sharon looked at him as if she didn't believe him. What man would say that? She thought. A good man like Andy Flynn, that's who would. Most men were after one thing, but not Andy, and that was the main reason she needed to let him go. She was hurting him be being with him. Sharon shook her head and stepped backwards as he spoke again. "You didn't add any stress to my life, I was glad my house sold so fast. You weren't ready and my not having a place to stay might have forced things faster than you would have liked. I know you like to think through everything, to have a plan." Andy paused a moment to think, "No, I think I'm the one adding stress to your life, pushing you out of your comfort zone. That's what is bringing on all your worry and panic."

"No, Andy, I am your stress factor. I bring on your anxiety. I'm causing you pain by being with you and I can't do this to you anymore." Sharon saw he was about to interject but before she let him stop her, she quickly continued. "If I should stay, well I would only be in your way and so I'll go, and yet I know that I'll think of you each step of my way."

Andy couldn't believe the words she was saying. He could hear her speaking them but it didn't sound like the woman he had known for so long. "Sharon, don't do this. I'm sure you're worried and it's been a hell of a few weeks. We've all been through a lot and you've been through even more."

"I love you, Sharon." She didn't seem to be listening to him so Andy held on to both her shoulders and looked her in the eye as he asked, "didn't you hear what I've said?"

She backed out of his arms, "I did. Andy, I love you too, for a long time now, but I've thought about this and as much as I'd love for this to work, I know deep down in my heart it is not ever going to. Sometimes love isn't enough." Sharon placed her hand on his cheek as she spoke, "it hurts me to see you hurt and it's too hard for me to send you out in harm's way. There were so many times I thought I lost you. I should have gone with my instincts. Then to almost lose you because you won't be truthful to me, or even to yourself when you know something isn't right. I knew from the beginning it wouldn't work."

Taking a step toward her, Andy voice shook as he said, "we can make it work; you just have to give it a chance."

She had made up her mind, but regret was still heard in her voice as she said, "bittersweet memories are all I'm taking with me. Good-bye, please don't cry, we both know that I'm not what you need. I will always love you. I hope life, will treat you kind and I hope that you have all that you ever dreamed of. Oh, I do wish you joy and I wish you happiness but above all this, I wish you love. I love you, I will always love."

He could tell from the tone of her voice and her body language she wasn't going to listen to anything he said right now. There wasn't much he could do to convince her otherwise when Sharon was in this frame of mind and he was exhausted from all he had been through. So Andy chose to be quiet and let her have her say, maybe they could talk when everything wasn't so raw and emotionally painful.

Even the whispers of her voice echoed in the now eerily quiet room as she spoke. "When you get back to work if they let you back to work that is, I'll be moved into my new office. You had told Taylor before..." Sharon wrapped her arms around herself as she looked at the window and thought about how much she missed her boss. They had run-ins with each other but who didn't when they worked together in a high-pressure job for so many years. She swallowed the lump in her throat before trying again; "you had told Taylor before we could always go back to being friends. Andy, I'd like to stay friends. You are my best friend, but I can understand if you don't want to do that."

She got no reply from him and as the silence filled the room again. She knew this was hard for him to accept and wanted to give him his space, so Sharon turned from the darkened LA skyline, picked up her purse, the trench coat she had taken off when she got there and made her way to the door. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. She paused to look back, with a watery smile she said one last time, "Andy, know I love you, I will always love you." With that, she stepped out the door and pulled it closed behind her. She leaned against the door for support; she wiped away the warm tears that now freely fell on her cheeks. Standing up iron-rod straight, Sharon then made her way down the hallway and out of the hospital lobby. Her heart broke more and more with each step she took away from Andy.  
~TBC~


	2. Chapter 2

~I Don't Love You Anymore~  
Song sung: by Travis Tritt  
Written by: Jill Colucci and Travis Tritt

Months later…

He was done watching this happen day after day, so he decided there was one way to handle the situation. Riling up his longtime friend was always one of Louie Provenza's favorite pastimes. Holding back a smile at his brilliant idea, he gruffly asked, "What are you still doing here, Flynn? You are just being a glorified desk monkey. Who knows if they will ever put you back in the field? Why not just take the medical retirement or go home and rest or take a much-needed vacation? You sure look like you need one, even though if you ask me, you just got back from one."

It took Andy a few seconds to reply to his old partner. Provenza was now training that new kid Nelson in how to get by with doing a little as possible and taking all the credit. "Yes, we all know you think a lovely stay in a hospital should be counted as a vacation."

Provenza pointed his finger at him and nodded in agreement. He then asked, "Well you weren't at work were you? So as I see it, it was a vacation!"

Andy ignored Louie's tantrum like he usually did and answered his first question. "Do you really want or need to know why I am still here? It's certainly not the pleasant company that keeps me coming back."

"E'gad. Seriously, Flynn if you're still not over the woman, make her listen. Do you really think she tells you everything?" Provenza patted Andy on the shoulder as he said, "I guarantee that Raydor has her own secrets she hasn't shared with anyone."

"Of course she does. We all do, but by keeping my health problems a secret from her time and time again I broke the trust she had in me." Andy rubbed his hand across his face, "Louie, I don't think I can ever get that back."

Provenza felt bad for his friend. In the beginning of all this he was sure his idiot friend would mess things up by dating their captain, but over time he saw how much they really did care for each other and thought it was going to work. He wanted Flynn to be happy after all they had been through together. "You never know if you sit here chained to your desk looking like a lost little puppy."

"It's the only way I get to see her at all. That is when Sharon dares to venture into Major Crimes anymore." Andy looked up at his new boss and smirked as he said, "with the way you are running this place you'll run it into the ground soon enough and there won't be a division left for her to check up on."

He held a hand up and looked offended, "Hey, it's not my fault they have too much useless paperwork and so many unnecessary rules to follow. It was about time they put me in charge of the division, I've practically been running it for over twelve years. I think Captain Provenza has a nice ring to it. Don't you? Really, Flynn, you need to make her talk to you."

Andy groaned at hearing him call himself Captain Provenza. The team heard it over and over throughout the day. Even Julio was done snickering about it, Mike took to rolling his eyes every time he heard Louie use the title. Andy was sure Tao must have a constant headache from the action. "Are you the one I should be taking relationship advice from? No, this has to be her decision and hers alone."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah I get that but there's no reason why you can't help her come to that decision sooner than later. For all our sakes do something before Darth Raydor has every cop in this building running scared of that death stare of hers and not wanting her wrath to fall on them." To give Flynn time to let what he said sink into that thick head of his, Provenza turned away for Andy's desk and headed for his office, that he had for just over a month, shutting the door with a thud.

A week later after his doctor's appointment, Andy sent an email to Sharon of his latest write up from his doctor and all the issues health wise he had experienced that week. Right down to the ache he felt in his left ankle when he rolled it going up the stairs, which ironically he was using more often to get back into shape. They might not be together anymore by no choice of his, but he wanted to show Sharon everything that was happening with his health. It was his way of being open about everything. Maybe if she saw that he was fine she would… Andy's thoughts stop he really didn't know what Sharon would do anymore. He used to know her very well but since he hurt her so badly, now he wasn't sure of anything involving her.

When he didn't hear anything from Sharon even after sending her weekly health updates. Andy couldn't take this indifference anymore. He had to tell Sharon what he was feeling, whether she liked it or not. Pushing back from his desk with such force his chair rolled hard into the office wall that once was Sharon's. He ignored the looks the bang of his sudden movements caused. Andy stretched his neck to both sides then straightened his jacket sleeves and stalked out of the murder room. He was in such a hurry that he missed his boss mutter, "well, it's about damn time. If this works out maybe now she will put her broomstick away for good."

Andy had a destination in his head and nothing was going to stop him now. At this point, he didn't care that they were at work. It would go against all Sharon's precious rules but the majority of their lives happened in this building and he knew she wasn't ready if ever to have him over to her condo. So in Andy's mind, it worked out that this was all her fault and if she wasn't happy about it, then she could only blame herself.

After yanking open the glass door that led to her new office, Andy held his hand up to the receptionist that was about to protest to him not having an appointment with the all and powerful Oz. He smirked at his internal joke. Can one woman be the Wizard of Oz and the Wicked Witch rolled into one persona? If that person is Captain… no, he corrected himself… if that person is Assistant Chief Raydor they can.

He watched her head jerk up as he let himself into her large office. When Sharon realized it was him she quickly looked back down to her reports. In her best don't bother me tone she said, "Andy, this isn't a good time."

Coldly he said, "Don't worry Chief, this will only take a moment." He walked around her desk and stood next to her chair. Andy was wondering how long it was going to take for her to look at him. Maybe this will be easier if she didn't look at him he thought, but he waited a heartbeat or two, and then finally gave up. As he figured it, he had two choices, leave without telling her or he could go for it. Andy chose the latter and went for it. "Sharon, I can't…" the words stuck in his throat. The pressure of them actually hurt, it was hard for him to breathe. It took all the willpower he had to swallow back the emotions that were building up in him. He forced himself to take a deep cleansing breath before trying again. He cleared his throat, "Sharon, you might not want to hear this, but I can't hide the way I feel about you anymore. I can't hold the hurt inside, keep the pain out of my eyes anymore. My tears no longer waiting, my resistance ain't that strong. My mind keeps recreating a life with you alone and…"

Andy closed his eyes. Sharon still hadn't bothered to look at him. He was somewhere between frustrated and angry with this woman, but he had come this far so he might as well get out all that he was feeling. He let his tangled frustrations coursing through him to use the hand he had been leaning on to take ahold of the arm of her chair. He spun it towards him to make her face him. The shock of the move made her look up. When their eyes connected, he finished what he wanted to confess, "and I'm tired of pretending I don't love you anymore." Andy reached out and lightly held her cheek, stroking the soft skin with the pad of his thumb, "let me make one last appeal to show you how I feel about you. 'Cause there's no one else I swear that holds a candle anywhere next to you. My heart can't take the beating, not having you to hold." His thumb traced a line to her lips and followed the fullness of them. He leaned closer to her, nosing aside the hair near her ear. He was sure he heard a moan from Sharon as he pushed the tresses away. Andy told her in a whisper, "A small voice keeps repeating deep inside my soul, it says I can't keep pretending I don't love you anymore. I've got to take the chance or let it pass by if I expect to get on with my life." With his hand on her chin, he placed a kiss on her cheek and stood up. The silence in her office was overwhelming as they stared at each other.

After the realization that she wasn't going to acknowledge anything he just said, Andy shook his head slowly and gave her a disbelieving smirk. It was going to be as he assumed, Sharon Raydor was too set in her ways to let him in. She had walked away from him that day in the hospital, she had made up her mind and for her, that was that. He just had to accept the fact that this wasn't going to work out between them. Andy walked to the door, with his hand on the handle but not turning around he quietly said, "I had to tell you how I feel. Know I love you and I always will, Assistant Chief."

~TBC~


	3. Chapter 3

~The Heart Won't Lie~

Sung by: Reba McEntire and Vince Gill.  
Written by: Kim Carnes and Donna Terry Weiss  
A/N: Hope you will bear with me for further chapters... to see where all this angst leads to. I'm really not trying to break anyone's heart but possibly there is a rhyme to my reason. Possibly ;0

As she watched Andy slam her door, a lone tear rolled down her cheek. It dawned on Sharon that she had just let the best thing that ever happened to her walk out. No, she had pushed him out her door just like she usually did. Except with Jack, he had never said those kinds of words. Her ex-husband was a charmer, but the games he played always had an ulterior motive, what was in it for him was always his goal. She never had to question Andy's motives; he always spoke from the heart. His words were the bare truth.

A shiver ran through Sharon as her finger followed the same path that Andy's thumb had taken moments before. When her hand ended up in her hair, she shivered again. She could still feel the whisper of his breath lingering on her ear and neck. His words had rocked her to the core, causing her to be unable think. The look on Andy's face, as she was trying to find her voice, was too much. It broke her heart more than it already was to see an almost sneer appear. Sharon had tried over and over to get her brain to function, to say anything, but she was frozen. It was all too much, too overwhelming for her to speak.

Right before Andy had left her office, the way he bitterly emphasized each word of her new title with a harsh tone, hit her hard and hurt her more than she could imagine. She hadn't wanted this promotion anyway. Sharon had no intention of putting her name in the running for the Assistant Chief position. She had been happy where she was, much happier than she had ever been in her whole LAPD career. She had friends and a family within her team. It wasn't mandatory that she put in for it, but Chief Pope had strongly emphasized that it wasn't an option not to. Her boss reminded Sharon that these chances didn't come along very often. Usually, it was only retirement, or sadly death, that opened up power positions and her goal was always to move up the ladder.

She had to agree that there weren't enough women in power positions on the force and with Brenda gone there was one less. Young girls and new recruits needed a positive female role model. She could really empathize with Assistant Chief Johnson when she didn't want to leave the life she had created in her division. Back in Sharon's IA days, her team was her friends since no one else within the LAPD would associate with them, but she couldn't fathom what the feeling of dying for each other felt like until she experienced it on her own with the Major Crimes team. She now understood the dilemma and heartache Brenda felt trying to make such a huge life decision.

Except right now, Sharon's heart was breaking for other reasons. She could feel the pain deep inside her, like a weight dragging her down. She had wanted this. She thought she could handle being without him, but Andy's loving confession got to her, almost stopping her over-thinking. She didn't think he really had a clue on how he affected her. Just seeing him was hard enough, but when he came to stand next to her, if she could have moved, she would have had him up against her desk. Having him that close, she could smell him and the scent was all Andrew Flynn. She had taken a deep breath, slowly closed her eyes as she felt her heart thump in her chest as it sent a hot current rushing through her. It was sensual and it turned her inside to… she was going to compare it to be like an electrical shock but it was more of a slow-burning heat that set her core on fire. Sharon hadn't been able to bring herself to look up at Andy. Having him this near her was overpowering her senses enough; if she had looked into his dark knowing eyes, she knew she would be lost. She needed to stop her reactions to him. She left him for a reason, but right now she couldn't recall why.

When Andy placed one hand on her desk and leaned down closer to her, his actions caused her to tighten her thighs together. Memories of their nights together scorched through her mind and body, the way he knew just where to touch her, how her body responded to his caress. Her hands wanted to reach out to feel once again the muscles hidden under those suits he wore so well. She missed Andy and not just the way their bodies had come to know each other so well, but also just being with him. The way she could talk to him. The way they could just sit at home relax and not talk about anything, just enjoying being in the other's company.

Sharon knew she had hurt him and even more so that she had messed up what they had taken years to build. She told herself over and over the last few months that she was doing this for him and for her heart. It was too broken to let Andy back in and that wasn't fair to either of them, especially Andy. If he felt he couldn't share things with her, then she wasn't the right woman for him. After all that he had been through, he deserved that much. Sharon thought she had come to terms with that, but then why did his words rip out what few small parts that remained of her heart? Sharon shuddered; her shoulders dropped and finally, she let her tears freely flow.

After letting go, she straightened in her chair and pulled herself together. She was at work, after all, and someone could come in her office at any time. She grabbed a few tissues and wiped her eyes and blew her nose. She ran her fingers through her hair and attempted to gain some control of herself. Sharon tried to concentrate on the paperwork in front of her, but she automatically went into over-thinking mode, throwing questions into her mind in rapid fire. Wasn't it too late to fix things? Hadn't she messed everything they had up? Why would he want her back after what she had done? After all that she had done to him? Did Andy really mean everything he said? She shook her head trying to clear it. Of course, he meant it, he wasn't the kind of guy who would say something like that if he didn't. Now he was leaving her like she did to him months before. Sharon had a moment of clarity as she again heard his barely-there voice whispering that he loved her and always would, then he was gone.

It was good that the day was almost over because she was nonfunctional. Sharon wondered as she drove home if was it possible for someone to live without their heart? She had been surviving with a broken one long before Andy came into her life. He helped her heal it. He had made it whole again, but that once again left her open to feel hurt even more painfully. So she had struck out first after making her mind think he was keeping secrets from her, by not telling her about his chest pains. He even had the team covering for him. She had enough of that with Jack over the last thirty years of her life. She was tired of being left in the dark with everyone around her knowing something was wrong and keeping it from her as if it was a joke she wasn't let in on. She didn't want or like to be pitied. Sharon would eventually find out and that left her broken, trying to go on when she felt like a bit of a fool to her friends and colleagues.

Now, now her heart was just crushed and she had done it to herself. When she thought she was protecting it from more pain, she was the one to ruin what was left of it.

Somehow she made it home and immediately changed for bed. Sharon sat against her headboard and tried to read, to distract her mind. She needed to stop thinking or her head would explode, but this wasn't working. She thought of Andy every day since she walked away, or was it every hour? It would be almost every minute if she let it happen. At work, it was easier to focus on other things. At home, it was much harder, especially since he had been living there. Sharon could look around and see things that reminded her of Andy. The covers she was under alone brought back memories of how they would laugh exhaustively when they realized that sometime during their exploration of each other's bodies all the blankets had ended up on the floor.

She dropped the book that she had barely glanced at beside her on the bed. Sharon let out a frustrated groan as she forced herself out of bed. She thought that maybe if she got a glass of wine it would help her slow her mind and let her sleep. Pouring a half a glass, she sat on the couch with her laptop set on her bent up knees with her white wine in one hand. She automatically went to her e-mail. It was for work she told herself, but she inside she knew the truth. Was she torturing herself by reading Andy's messages again or was she being hopeful? She asked herself.

Sharon remembered from weeks before, that by the time she received his fourth e-mail she was looking forward to Andy's bi-weekly messages. At first, she didn't read them, but then her curiosity got to her and she opened one to see what he wanted to say. She was genuinely happy to see he was doing better, but Sharon was worried about Andy going back to work. He had been through so much these last few months. She had really thought Chief Pope would have convinced him to retire. Except if she knew Andy, and she did know him very well, he was as stubborn as Provenza and he wouldn't easily let go of the job he lived for. He would fight against that with all he had. Andy once told her that his work was all he really had to look forward to, but that was before her.

She stopped at the thought. It hurt too much to think all Andy had now was his job to get up for. He had to know he was wrong; he had his kids and his friends. She had hoped that he would still consider her a friend and come to her if things got too bad. Sharon understood it would be too hard to talk to her so soon after she had left him. It was even hard for her to think about it. She spent the past years with him going from colleagues to associates, then on to become friends to best friends too much, much more. They had come a long way from where at one point in her IA days they were enemies. "I hope we don't regress back that far," Sharon said out loud.

Her mind sent her looking back over the years, of all the things she always meant to say but words didn't come easily. So many times through empty fears. Of all of the nights, she tried to pick up the phone so scared of who might be answering. She tried to live her life from day to day, but seeing him across the room today had just given me away. Because she had come to understand the hard way the heart won't lie. Sometimes life gets in the way but there's one thing that won't change, she knew she had tried. Sharon had come to understand her mind would try and stop her but her heart won't lie on how she really felt about Andy.

With a sigh, she looked down at her laptop and her emails. It had been hard to resist the urge to send notes back to Andy in reply, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. Sharon would even go as far as typing what she was thinking, then deleting it all right away. It wasn't fair for her to comment when she was the one that ended what they had. Again she found herself asking, wasn't this what she wanted? It was, she confirmed and she had to commit to self-preservation. That was why she didn't answer his emails. Being with Andy just wasn't going to work. Sharon knew she should have gone with her gut from the beginning, followed and trusted her instincts, not her heart.

Andy's emails were their only communication. She wasn't ready to see him or have to talk with him. Sharon Raydor wasn't a coward; she just didn't trust herself to hear his voice or to be in the same room with him. That was why she stayed away from Major Crimes and asked Pope to help when they needed supervision, which seemed like it was all the time lately. She rolled her eyes at that thought. Sharon was sure if something didn't change, the Chief would simply close the department to end the problem, even if it was his creation. If that happened, a certain few over a particular age would be convinced or forced to retire. The rest would be split up into other departments. Sometimes Sharon wondered if Lieutenant, or now Captain Provenza, kept messing up on purpose just to try and make her go in there. She was too busy learning the ins and outs of her new position to deal with them or that were what she told herself.

As she took a sip of wine she scrolled down to Andy's latest email, it had a postscript at the bottom. Sharon once again laughed at what it had said, just like the first time she read it. She couldn't blame Andy for trying. The email also had an attachment, she double clicked on it. It was a note from his doctor confirming he had been indeed cleared for full duty and extra-curricular activities as his PS had informed her. She had known he was trying to lighten what they were going through. It was what Andy Flynn did; to make her smile or anyone smile when they were hurting. After laughing at that email, Sharon was sure they could still be friends at least, but that was before this morning when he stormed into her new office. Now because of her stunned silence after his heartfelt confession, Sharon didn't know where they could go from here or if there was anywhere for them to go after all that she had done to break them apart. She didn't think there was any way to fix the damage she had done to their relationship. Letting out a long sigh, she laid her head back against the couch and stared up at the ceiling.

Old desires had made her act carelessly. Long after all this, after the fire. After the scattered ashes fly through the four winds blown and gone would he come back to her? Did she want him back? Wasn't it easier to keep moving forward than trying to have what they had before? Sharon didn't think she could keep going back and forth. It wasn't fair to either of them especially him. So she's tried to live her life from day to day but seeing Andy across the room today in her office just gave her away. It was that moment when it started to sink in that her heart won't lie but she would have to fight it. It was for both their sakes. They just didn't work as a couple. Some people are just better at being friends.

Sharon was feeling even more melancholy now. She had just finished her glass of wine and contemplated going to bed when there was a chime from her laptop. It was a call on Skype. She looked at her watch and immediately became worried at the time of night. With concern, Sharon answered quickly saying, "it's late. What is wrong?"

~TBC~


	4. Chapter 4

~I Hope You Dance~   
Sung by: Lee Ann Womack  
Written by: Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers  
Disclaimer: I own nothin' of Major Crimes. Sadly, nothin'!

With an eye roll that was exactly like her mother's, Emily asked, "Mom, why do you always think something is wrong when I call after 8pm?"

"You know it is way past eight and besides it's what moms do, Em." Sharon set her empty glass down on the side table then settled back into the couch cushions and looked at her daughter. "Sooo, tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong. We just got in, and before you ask who the 'we' is, I mean my friends and I. It is a Friday night, Mom and I don't have a show right now. I am young and still like to go out." Emily laughed as she watched her mom roll her eyes at her last comment.

"So, you're telling me the first thing you, 'young' people," Sharon had used her fingers to air quote her daughter's words, "do when you get home is call their mom?" She then repeated her first question. "What's wrong Em? Hmmm, or should I ask, what's his name?"

Emily laughed loudly, throwing her head back. "Wow, Mom you do know me so well."

"Of course I do. I've known you a long time." They both laughed then spent the next half hour talking about the guy Emily had met a few weeks ago. Sharon had worried that with her and Jack as an example that it would stop her kids from opening their hearts, that they would build a wall as their mother did. That was the last thing she wanted for them. She had tried to shield them from their marital problems. It was easier when they were younger. As they got older, she saw that it was hard for both Emily and Ricky to trust fully. Sharon always worried she did them more harm than good by trying over and over to make it work with Jack, but it made her happy to see that her daughter was still a hopeless romantic deep inside.

They continued to laugh at the stories Emily shared. Sharon was enjoying their time until her daughter grew silent. Then in a serious voice, she asked, "What's wrong, Mom?"

"Why do you ask that?" Receiving a glare from Emily, that was just like her mothers, was all it took for Sharon not to be able to hold back all that had been going on between her and Andy. She hadn't meant to say so much or even anything at all. Though she knew eventually she would have to tell her children that they broke up, she just never planned on going into detail. She had been holding back the dam for too long and it all just spilled out.

Emily was shocked, she thought everything was going great between her mom and Andy. Seeing the pain on her mother's face, she tried to ease the tension by saying jokingly, "Wow, I just ask what's wrong and I get a spewed with my mom's love life." The second her mom had answered her call, she could tell something was wrong. Though she smiled, her mom's eyes only held sadness. Since she thought things were going well between Andy and her, she knew something must have happened. So Emily talked about herself for a bit then ask how she was doing. It must be bad for her to actually talk to her about her boyfriend. Usually, her mom wasn't open to talking much about that part of her personal life. She would always say everything was 'fine.' That was Sharon Raydor's go-to phrase. Emily had been worried this would happen. It wasn't easy for her mom to let someone past her walls and now that she had, she was feeling vulnerable. She was wondering how long it would take her mom to do something like this. She knew her mother would try and protect her heart by pushing Andy away for some reason she thought was good for him.

Though Emily and her father shared a last name, that was about all they shared. Jack Raydor had hurt them all, more so their mother, over and over. Oh, he tried to make it up to her years ago at Christmas by having or more like making her stay at his apartment, but all that did was show her that he was once again drinking. Emily had been thrilled for her mom when she finally told them she was seeing Andy. Though Rusty had informed Ricky and her long ago the two were dating. Her little brother had laughed as he explained they just didn't know they were actually dating. Andy was nothing like her father; he truly wanted to see her mom happy. He didn't use manipulation tactics like Jack did to make others do what he wanted them to do. No, Andy was good for her mom. Emily knew she just needed to get her mom to see that and admit that she needed to let go, stop over-thinking everything and just feel.

Seeing the tears welling up in her mom's eyes, she quietly said, "Don't worry you can fix this."

Sharon reached for a tissue, dabbed her eyes and shook her head and said through her sniffles, "no, it's too late."

It was when Emily received a look of disbelief she offered sincerely, "no, it's not and you really can."

"Emily, but how could Andy want me back after all I've put him through?" Sharon wiped another wayward tear off her cheek and shook her head harder as she added, "Why would he? Even after what he said? Who's to say I wouldn't hurt him again?"

"Mom, it's called real unconditional love. He loves you with all his heart and knows you were hurt before. What he didn't tell you about feeling chest pains brought out the distrust you lived with for so many years with dad. I get that. I'm sure Andy gets that too, but he's been trying to make it up to you." Emily didn't like bringing up her dad too often with her mom but she needed her mother to see that Andy was nothing like her father. "Mom, did dad ever do that? I mean really try, not just show up at our door, beg you to take him back to only leave us all again?"

Sharon frowned at the sad memories Jack had caused them all but then smiled at her daughter's advice. "When did you get to be so wise Emily Raydor?"

"The moment I was lucky enough to be born your daughter. Though it might have taken a few years for it to sink into my stubborn head, which I happen to also get from you." Emily laughed. After the glare she received she continued, "so, Mom what are you going to do now?"

"I really have no idea," Sharon said with a shrug.

Emily was getting frustrated at receiving no other answers. She knew her mom was stubborn and had experienced that her whole life but this was to an extreme. Her mom had found someone that made her happy, nobody knew better than Emily and Ricky that their mom deserved some happiness in her life. "Commee oonnn, Mommm." Stopping when she received the glare over the glasses look. She had to admit it was a bit whiny, but she was trying to get her to listen. "No really, he made you happy. Isn't that what's important? If he made your life miserable like dad did, then yes, I would say dump him." She ignored the next glare and said, "don't you remember the advice you gave us as kids?"

"I gave both you and your brothers a lot of strongly worded suggestions. There was, don't run with scissors. Don't chew with your mouth open. Always say please and thank you. Treat others, as you would want to be treated. Be safe and be kind." She was counting them off on her fingers. Sharon raised an eyebrow, as she asked, "Should I go on?"

"Very funny, Mom. Whereas that is all great advice, that's not what I'm talking about." She scooted closer to the camera. "First off look around you. I'm sure everything in the condo is perfectly put in its place except all the files and paperwork on the coffee table and by your bed. My point is you are working too hard. Shouldn't people at you age be retired or at least slowing down, or working less?" Emily knew she made a mistake when she could almost feel the burn through her laptop from her mother's hard stare.

"Emmmily!" With a serious tone, Sharon dragged out the m in her daughter's name. "Watch it." She warned as she narrowed her eyes.

"Uh oh." She shook her head then smiled, "no, Mom, I don't mean it like that. I just mean you've been working almost all your life, you shouldn't have to still be doing so much."

Sharon didn't hesitate, "I happen to really like my job."

Emily nodded, knowing her mom lived to help others and her position allowed her to do just that. "We are all very proud of you and you are a wonderful role model for so many girls and women. You prove we can be anything we want to be as long as we work at it, but you are overworking yourself. You need to stop once in awhile and enjoy life."

Holding up a hand, Sharon stated firmly, "I happen to enjoy being busy and the job I do is rewarding."

"I know you do. At least you did when you were head of Major Crimes." After Emily received another glare she quickly changed the subject. "Now back to me giving my brilliant, beautiful, over-thinking, stubborn mom some advice."

Sharon laughed and shook her head, "You do think you are funny don't you?"

Emily ignored her mom and went on, "among all your other life advice you use to tell us what really stuck with me the most, besides the not run with scissors one is, that I hope you dance." She could hear her mom take in a sharp breath since she had an idea on where Emily was going. With a smile, she continued, "you'd tell us I hope you never lose your sense of wonder. Get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger. May you never take one single breath for granted, God forbid love ever leave you empty-handed." That part was always hard to remember for both Raydor women. Emily continued teary-eyed, "I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean. Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens. Promise me that you'll give fate the fighting chance." She heard her mother's voice join with hers as she recited the next part, "and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance."

With a hand covering her eyes, Sharon voice shook as she said, "Emily…"

She could see that her mom was too emotional to say anything more so she spoke for her… "Mom, I still think about what you taught us every day. When I get nervous before or during a performance, I can hear your voice in my head saying, I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance. Never settle for the path of least resistance, living might mean takin' chances but they're worth taking. It would always help my nerves calm down and I know I have to work and fight for what I want to achieve in life."

It made the mom in Sharon happy that her daughter actually had listened to her all those years ago and that some advice had sunk into her head. "Sometimes you just never know what your children absorb." She smiled tearfully, "Emily, I was only trying to get you both to know it's not easy to get what you want out of life. No one is just going to hand it to you. You have to work hard, have determination and don't let the negative people bring you down. You, Ricky and now Rusty make me proud no matter what you do with your life and as long as you happy." Sharon used another tissue to dry her eyes. "The next part of my mom advice is what I had a hard time reminding myself of. I wanted my kids to learn to do as I said not as I did. It was a hard lesson for me to learn and I'm still learning it."

"Oh, I know what you mean. You did a great job, Mom." Emily felt bad that her mother had been through so much from her dad and all she went through just trying to do her job while the head of IA. Emily smiled through her tears and softly said, "I've heard from a very smart lady that tears can be cleansing and therapeutic. We got this far might as well finish the advice and we can cry together. "The last and hardest part of it was, loving might be a mistake but it's worth making. Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter. When you come close to selling out reconsider. Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance. I hope you dance."

After a few quiet minutes of tears and sniffling, Sharon nodded and agreed, "alright I understand and will think about it all."

"Mom!" With another eyeroll, Emily laughed as she said, "that's the point, stop thinking and go for it. Oh wait, wait! Don't think I've forgotten about what you said earlier. Back to what Andy told you in your office. My God, Mom after the things he said how did you not take him right then and there? You do have an office with a door that locks and a strong solid desk, right?" Emily winked when her mom's face turned red, "or why didn't you chase after him, push him up against a wall or grab him by the suspenders pull him down and…"

Sharon held up her hand and raised her voice in disbelief, "Emily Elizabeth Raydor, enough! I get the picture."

Emily knew when her mother used their full name that she was pushing her luck so she decided to stop taunting her. "Alright, I'll stop but seriously Mom, how did you resist?"

When Sharon was done blushing she took a quick look around her condo, though she knew full well that nobody was home. It was just a self-conscious reaction to what she was going to admit. Slipping a loose lock of hair behind her left ear she leaned forward and in a low whisper, she said, "I have to honestly say a few of those ideas have crossed my mind. Now, I would never do anything like that at work mind you, but it is nice to fantasize about." Sharon's eyes widened and her face was beet red again as she realized what she just confessed to her daughter.

"Way to go, mom, even if you didn't do any of those things, it still great that you thought about it. See there's all you need to get your boyfriend back. Next time you see him just casually walk up to him and mention all the things you were thinking about doing to him when he was in your office. Your problems will be solved, but you might create new ones if Andy does what I think he'll do." Emily couldn't stop laughing at the shock on her mom's face.

Playing it off, Sharon asked innocently, "New problems, as in?"

Emily smiled and answered, "just that the Assistant Chief of the LAPD getting caught making out in a police station. That's what." She watched her mom roll her eyes again before saying, "I'll tell you what you are going to do. I hope you dance just like you always taught your kids, especially me. It's your turn; you of all people deserve this. After all you've sacrificed in your life. Mom, go "dance" with Andy and that's an order." Emily used air quotes when she said the word dance. She then blew a kiss and ended the call.

Sharon stared at the blank screen before finally closing her laptop. She got up and headed for bed, knowing she'd be able to finally sleep. She was exhausted and feeling emotionally raw after their mother-daughter talk. Before Sharon crawled into bed she decided to change into one of Andy's t-shirt that had been left behind in the laundry. She hadn't washed it, it still carried his scent. As she settled under the covers she lifted the shirt to her nose and took a deep breath then slowly let it out. Sharon's eyes were closing as she thought Emily might be right. Maybe, it was her turn to dance.

~TBC~


	5. Chapter 5

~A Guy With A Girl~  
Sung by: Blake Shelton  
Written by: Ashley Gorley and Bryan Simpson

As she got ready for bed, her daughter's advice, or really Sharon's own life advice, kept going through her mind. Settling under the covers, she admitted to herself that she missed having Andy to come home with or especially to come home to. She remembered the night she couldn't sleep. He came out to the living room where she was still up doing her thinking. He had startled her out of deep thought when he called her name and had tried to get her to go to bed. She told him she would join him soon, but that little while turned into hours.

She was in such turmoil over losing Taylor and killing Dwight. It was more the weight of not feeling guilty about taking another person's life that haunted her, no matter what he had done. Sharon finally came to terms with it and was nice to just have Andy by her side. She knew he would be there for her no matter what, except now she was the one pushing him away. All the pain she felt over the last few months, she had caused all on her own. She started to think that maybe Emily was right and there was still time to fix the huge mess she had created. She needed Andy more than she wanted to admit.

Sharon convinced herself not to call him this late, but she gave up trying to come up with a reason not to text him. Before self-doubt crept back in, she quickly picked up her phone that was charging on her nightstand. In her mind, it was safer to do it this way. Andy could be asleep and he would just see her messages in the morning. It wasn't fair of her to ruin the man's sleep and his life. Besides a text was much safer because Sharon knew if she heard his voice she might just head over to his place tonight.

After deleting her last ten attempts at what to say, and before she could delete the next one, she quickly sent the short text that read, 'I just wanted to say good-night.' It was close to a minute later she jumped when her phone rang in her hand. Startled, Sharon ended up dropping it. She frantically flipped the blankets around trying to find it. Right before she tossed the phone, she saw on the screen that it was Andy and she was worried he would hang up before she located it. The dim lighting in her room helped her to see the glow of her cell phone across the bed from her. Sharon wondered how it ended up all the way on the other side, but figured it happened when she was tossing her covers around in search of it. Luckily, it was still ringing when she slid her finger across the screen and said breathlessly, "hello."

Andy was quick and to the point. "Good night, really? You ignore me for months and when I was in your office today I practically froze being near you. Then as I spilled my heart, you barely acknowledged me. Now, out of the blue suddenly I get graced with a random goodnight text from..."

Sharon cringed at Andy's tone, but she didn't blame him for being mad and frustrated with her. She quickly interrupted by saying, "Andy, I'm..." She hesitated before softly trying again, "I'm sorry about earlier today, you…you just took me by surprise. I really didn't think you wanted anything to do with me after…" Sharon never had such a hard time trying to speak. Taking a breath she continued, "after what I had done."

There was a pause before Andy let out a sigh and finally spoke, "by the way, just so you know, I'm not doing this...this by text messages or by phone. Sharon, if you want to talk you'll have to do it face to face. I will say that I understand you have been hurt and lied to before by a certain Jack-ass, either by flat out lies or by omission. When I kept my health issues from you once again, you had every right to protect your heart." Andy took a long breath. There was silence on both ends of the line.

Just as Sharon was about to tell Andy her heart was in more pain being away from him, she heard a commotion in the background, then some shouting. She pulled the phone away from her ear when Andy hollered back to someone, "alright, alright. Just calm down, you are red as a tomato." Realizing that he was yelling into the phone, he apologized, "oh sorry, Sharon that wasn't for you. That was for my pain-in-the a…." Andy stopped himself and changed his mind to say, "that was my boss. You know Provenza well enough to know I have to get going."

"You have a case?" she asked surprised.

Though she couldn't see him, Andy nodded as he said, "Yes. We just got rolled out a few hours ago."

Sharon frowned. She really did miss that. You would think she would appreciate not getting called out at all hours of the night. It did affect her that her whole entire team was still working together, while she sat at home in bed, alone at that.

Andy wasn't quite sure what was going on between them after getting no response from her in her office. He had given up hope for them. He spent his evening at an AA meeting, but not because what Sharon did had driven him to want a drink. It was because he was fighting back the urge to go to Sharon's condo and kiss some sense into her, but she had made it perfectly clear she was done with him. Well, that was until he got her mystery text out of the blue. Receiving another stern glare from Provenza, he knew he had to get working. "Look, Sharon, I've got to go. We are really busy and my boss is a bit of a grump, it's worse when I'm at a crime scene and not working."

As if on cue, Andy jumped when he heard his name being bellowed again. "Flynn, if you don't put that damn phone down and stop smiling like the Cheshire cat, I'll put you back in the murder room as my designated desk monkey to do all the dreaded useless paperwork."

Sharon laughed. "Andy, you can tell Captain Provenza I heard that. As long as one of you two are actually filling out the very important administration part of the job and not the suspect like you two did before. I guess I'll have to accept it."

Andy didn't like the fact that Louie had outed him about smiling. He wanted to stay neutral, distant from Sharon. His heart had been torn into pieces and he was trying to protect what was still barely beating. "Since you could hear that blowup, I really have to…."

"How about dinner?" It was out of her mouth before she could stop the words, though she felt relieved she said it.

He didn't hide his shock as he hesitated, "ah, Sharon...um...I don't know…"

Her smile dropped off her face. She knew she had blown it again. They were finally talking, well somewhat communicating but she had to rush things by blurting out a dinner invitation. She understood why he would be leery of what she was doing.

There was a silence between them before Andy finally offered, "maybe… maybe after we close this case. It's the best I can do right now." Then he quickly ended the call.

Sharon stared at the phone in her hand. She was surprised when she heard the dial tone. This was going to be as hard as she thought. However, if there was anything worth fighting for, it was Andy, and she was ready.

It had been a horrible week since Major Crimes caught a movie star killing spree case. Sharon was up to her head in paperwork. She was positive Captain Provenza was trying to make her life miserable with the poorly completed reports he turned in during the case. How did one fill out a statement with using barely five words? Must be all those years of experience he had always told her about. Sharon had no problem with being busy, but her mind hadn't been on her work this week, and with Emily calling her every day asking if she had made any of her fantasies come true didn't help her concentration any.

As excepted things were still tense between Andy and her. After the night she had randomly out of the blue asked him to dinner they hadn't talked since then. She could tell he was apprehensive around her and she didn't blame him. They had of course seen each other when she was in the murder room going over evidence of the ongoing case. Things were kept professional. When she tried to make eye contact with him, he would look away or if she stood closer to him, he would move across the room. Sharon was tired of waiting for her chance to have some alone time with Andy, so she decided to take a chance. In passing, she suggested to Captain Provenza that things might progress quicker if the team took a break, got to go home and come back refreshed tomorrow. She heard later that day he took her up on the idea and took all the credit for it. As Louie always said, how else did he become a captain than by taking credit for other officers' ideas?

That was how Sharon found herself now sitting in her car in the parking garage waiting for Andy to leave work. She thought it was about time she followed the great advice that her daughter had given her. She felt a little bit like a stalker as she sat there watching everyone coming and going. Sharon knew Major Crimes was busy all week, but she had gotten to the point where she knew Andy was avoiding her on purpose. It was a form of payback, which she completely deserved, she knew that. It felt as though she had been waiting forever when she finally saw him. Taking in a deep breath, then exhaling slowly she repeated out loud, "it's your time to dance." She got out of her car and when Sharon was a few steps behind him she spoke, "excuse me, Lieutenant Flynn. Do you mind if I have a word with you?" He didn't slow down, nor did he make any acknowledgment that he heard her, though there was no way he couldn't. She repeated the question, he again ignored her but he did give her a cold glance over his shoulder. Sharon didn't back down but stayed a few steps behind Andy.

Andy could feel her get closer behind him, without turning around he asked through gritted teeth, "What are you doing here? I thought you left a while ago?"

As Sharon was about to respond, her mouth snapped closed. Wait, she thought, so he was avoiding her if he knew she had left already or at least he thought she did. Andy must've been waiting until she was gone to leave so he didn't have to see her. This was all her fault and she needed to try to fix this. All she wanted to do was run in the other direction, but her daughter's words echoed through her head. 'I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance. Never settle for the path of least resistance. Living might mean taking chances but they're worth taking. Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making.' Now she knew Andy was worth every chance she needed to take and any mountain she had to climb. She was done being a wallflower and sitting out of the dance.

When he stopped at his car door, he finally looked at her. Sharon was determined to get a moment with Andy, but she could also see the determination on his face to get away from her. Summoning the courage she didn't say anything, but just took a step towards him. When he took a step back, she moved forward again. Their movements kept up until Andy's back bumped into the parking garage wall, except Sharon didn't stop until she was inches away from him. She enjoyed the look of shock on his face. She was sure he didn't expect for her to act like this. In a whisper, she asked, "So, that dinner? Now, tonight at my place."

"Sharon, following me and forcing me to talk to you isn't going to get me to spend time with you." When she remained quiet, he wanted clarity so he asked. "You want a dinner with me, Andrew Flynn, the man you left?" He told himself it was only to confirm what it was she really wanted since he wasn't sure where this was coming from. They hadn't really talked much since she left his hospital room and one short phone call didn't help explain anything she was thinking.

She listened to Andy ask his questions with concern. She tried to explain herself, "I know it won't mean much right now, but I want to say I'm sorry for what I did to you. I was hurt and confused, and in return, I hurt you, the man I care about." Sharon's eyes welled up with unshed tears. She blinked rapidly to try and not let them fall, then she continued, "If you would be willing to give me another chance I thought we could try again. I know there is a lot more I need to say, but I wanted to tell you that I liked getting all the emails on your health updates. I started to look forward to them. I'm grateful you are still working and doing much better. Whether this goes further or not, I do hope we can remain friends. I miss us, but I miss our friendship the most."

Somewhere off in the distance they heard a voice echo, "don't screw it up this time, idiot." Sharon's face turned red at the thought that Captain Provenza had heard anything that just occurred between her and Andy or had seen their tight proximity.

Andy was tired of pretending he didn't still care for her so he gave up. He took Sharon's hand in his that she had rested it on his chest when she was talking to him. Sheepishly, he said in a low voice but loud enough for Louie to hear too, "Oh don't worry, I've learned my lesson. If I get her back, I'm never going to let her go."

With a loud huff of a laugh, they heard, "That's great but I'm not talking to you this time, Flynn. I mean her, though you both are idiots!"

Sharon's eyes widened and Andy rolled his eyes at his friend's words. They relaxed when they heard the echo of Provenza's retreating steps die out. He had to agree they were both being idiots and that needed to end, now. So he leaned closer to Sharon, nosed her hair away from her ear and softly said, "I'm just the guy with the girl everybody wants to know. Wishing we were here alone. Wondering how I ever got her hand in mine and looking at her thinking isn't she beautiful." Sharon once again couldn't speak, just like when he was in her office a week ago, but she wasn't going to make the same mistake twice. So instead of words, she used actions to hopefully make Andy see how she really felt about him. Giving him a broad smile, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him.

Their kiss quickly deepened. When the need for air pulled them part Andy leaned his forehead on hers and breathlessly said, "I don't mind being the guy with the girl that don't know how he got her, but he isn't going to ever let her go." With that said, he held on to Sharon's hip and pulled her flush with his body and kissed her passionately.

When Andy leaned his forehead on hers again, after a breath she repeated, "So dinner?" If he wasn't ready for that step yet, she had come to the conclusion since she had kept him waiting for years, Sharon would wait for him now and for however long it would take. So she was surprised when he replied right away.

"As in a date?" Andy asked curiously looking into her eyes that were now a dark green from building desire. He liked this new take-charge kind of Sharon. He knew she had no problem ruling her professional life, but she wasn't so forthcoming in her personal life or at least with him anyways.

Sharon smiled as she answered back, "Yes, Andy as in a date."

 

"A date?" He took their joined hands and pointed at himself. "With me? As in a real date not just one of our old-fashioned non-dates?" His voice was lighter than when she first pinned him up against the cold wall.

She hoped they were getting somewhere, but when Andy smirked at her instead of pulling away, Sharon knew he was kidding with her now. She rolled her eyes at him and mentioned, "In your last email there was an attachment. So, you've been cleared for extra-curricular activities, hmmm?" She smoothed her free hand along his chest. She did miss that feeling, of warmth and strength that was all Andy.

He smile grew bigger as he questioned her, "If I am correct the Assistant Chief of the LAPD has cornered me in a dark isolated part of the parking garage and is now asking me out on a date? Can you confirm this?"

Sharon's laughter ended with a snort laugh that echoed against the concrete walls. After catching her breath, she said, "Nice to see you still have your sense of humor, Andy. Did your doctor clear you for that too?" As she talked she used her free hand to playfully run up and down his dark purple tie. "Because I'm not sure he knows how dangerous it can be to your health." She then snapped one of his suspenders. Sharon had missed bantering with Andy. For the first time in a long time, she felt hopeful.

"Oh, I think you know exactly what the doctor cleared me for." There was no teasing in Andy's voice that time, but there was a small growl as he pulled Sharon up against him again.

~TBC~


	6. Chapter 6

Song by: ….  
Written by: ...  
Oh...I will put the song choice at the end of the chapter. I feel the song title gives away too much to reveal it just yet.

The next morning Sharon wasn't surprised to get a call from Emily. She was shocked at the time and wondered if her daughter had even gone to bed yet. There was no hello's or nice pleasantries when she answered the Skype call on her laptop in the living room where she had been enjoying a cup of coffee. "Weeelll?" was all Emily asked.

Sharon took a sip out of her mug before saying, "I did ask Andy to dinner...here at the condo, but we never actually ate."

Emily was surprised her mom finally did something but she wanted to know more. "That doesn't answer my question. So as I asked, well?"

"Let me just say…" Sharon looked at her fingers as they fidgeted around the drink she was holding then continued, "that the parking garage fantasy can be crossed off the list."

Emily's hand covered her mouth in shock. "Oh my god Mom! You did "it" in the LAPD parking garage?"

"Gosh no, Emily." Sharon rolled her eyes, "we made it back home for that."

At her daughter's slacked jaw, Sharon leaned her head back and laughed loudly, ending with a snort. "Let me just say there is a dark corner where Andy parked his car and well..."

She held up a hand to stop her, "Ok, Mom ok, I get it." After shaking her head, Emily smirked as she asked, "Though you have told me, did you grab him by the tie or suspenders?"

Sharon couldn't hold back a huge smile remembering that moment. "Suspenders." She wasn't done embarrassing her know-it-all daughter, so with a smirk, she said, "I guess what they say about making-up is true." She fanned herself with her hand, "it's was amaz…"

"Really Mom. Enough! I get the picture." Sharon couldn't stop laughing at her red-faced daughter. Emily pouted as she said, "I don't think it's fair that my mom is having more and as you say quite better sex than her daughter."

When her child said the word sex, Sharon stopped her laughter. As much as they were open in their family to talk about anything, she had to admit hearing some things from her children still got to her a little. Recovering, she nodded, "Well played, Emily. Well played." Sharon figured two could play at this game. So she smiled as she casually said, "You did start this by pushing me to 'dance' but you win. I will stop talking about what happens behind my bedroom door, though it is amazing and extremely satisfying."

At that moment, Rusty happened to be crossing the living room to get a snack. His eyes went wide and covered his ears as he kept walking. "Ugh Mom, did you really just say what I think you said? No, don't tell me cause I'm already scarred for life with what was happening when Andy moved in here before."

Emily was enjoying the shocked look on their mom's face. "Ohhh, do tell me more baby brother," she said laughing.

Rusty came back with an apple and sat down next to Sharon, but was looking at Emily as he smugly said, "By the way, I'm not sure if you know this or not, but the doors and walls in this condo are not soundproof and I can only turn my music up so loud."

After a mortified gasp, Sharon used her Darth Raydor tone, "Russell Thomas Beck!"

"What? Hey, it's not fair to use my full name when it's not even my fault." Rusty quickly pointed at the laptop, "she asked."

"Who asked what?" The question came from a deep voice behind them.

"Oh, hi Andy," Emily said with a wink and waved to the man she could see standing behind her mom. "Nice pajamas."

Andy waved back as he leaned down and kissed Sharon on the cheek. He then looked back at the laptop, "Hey, there Emily. Everything alright?"

"That would be my cue to leave." Rusty got up and grabbed his keys and backpack.

"Leave?" Sharon questioned in concern. She worried her son was running out because Andy was there. She hoped that all the things that had happened hadn't pushed Rusty to revert back to his old ways. She and Andy had enough problems to work out without adding her youngest to the list.

Rusty moved towards the front door, "Yep, I am leaving. I called Gus and I'm staying over there for a few days until you two lovebirds get it out of your system."

"Ohhh," came from the computer screen. "I don't think I've seen mom blush or smile this much in a long time," Emily said with a big smile of her own. She was truly happy for her. "I'm positive, we have you to thank for that Andy." Her eyes grew wet when she watched Andy sit down next to her mother and take her hand in his. He stroked his thumb over her knuckles as they just stared into each other's eyes. It was as if no one else existed. "Awe, I want that. That, there, is my life goal."

"See, Emily. See what I have to live with," Rusty jokingly complained.

"Live with what?" Andy questioned without glancing away from Sharon's sparkling green eyes.

Sharon didn't move either as she asked, "I'm sorry, Rusty. I thought you were leaving?"

Another, "ohh" and a loud laugh came from Emily. "Mom got you on that one, brother." She paused as she watched them a bit longer, then asked, "Andy, you have a son right? Feel free to give him my number."

Sharon quickly turned her head towards her daughter, narrowing her eyes as she said, "Em, I thought you were seeing someone."

"If Andy's son is half the man his dad is well then… you know," Emily winked at them again and laughed. "On that note, I will bid you all a good day. Can't wait to catch up with you again, Mom, but maybe not so many details next time." Emily rolled her eyes as she ended the call. After they all had said their goodbyes, Rusty, quickly as he could, made his escape.

Andy kept Sharon's hand in his as she set the closed laptop on the table with her coffee mug. "We didn't have much time to talk last night about all this, Sharon because we've been busy with…" Andy gave her a lop-sided grin before searching for the right words. "I'll just say we spent our time getting reacquainted or what did the Kid say, getting it out of our system? Which I have to admit will never happen. You are apart of me. You are in my blood, deep in my heart and soul."

Sharon smiled at Andy's words and slid closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her in tight against his chest, "as you are in mine, Andy," she whispered.

He laid his head on hers and let out a grateful sigh. Andy really hadn't had much hope after leaving Sharon's office that day. After he had confessed his feelings to her and she just sat there, he had to admit he gave up. He didn't think he would ever get to hold the woman he loved in his arms ever again. Now Andy was content to just sit there and hold her, but he did have some questions he needed answered. So he quietly asked, "I did want to know though, what changed your mind about us? Don't get me wrong, I will be eternally grateful for it, but I didn't think you would ever…."

Sharon cut him off. She couldn't handle hearing the hurt in Andy's voice so she tried to explain her actions. "I'm not sure you'll understand or even if I understand why I did what I did or where I should start, but I will try. First off, you need to know what you said in my office struck straight to my heart. I just froze and couldn't move. Then after you left, the words started to sink into my stubborn head and the look on your face broke my heart even more than it was. Secondly, after lots of thinking, I realized how much I was really hurting you and myself by pushing you away. I also realized the heart doesn't lie, I just needed to listen to it. Lastly, I knew deep inside all along that we are much better together as a team than we are apart." Sharon lifted her head and placed the hand Andy wasn't holding, on his cheek. She leaned in and kissed him, trying to express through touch and feel what she wasn't sure her words were conveying. As the kiss continued, to catch her breath she leaned back, but to only be pulled in for another deeper kiss when Andy placed his hand on the back of her head.

When his fingers moved through her hair down her side to rest on her hip, Sharon sighed at the shiver the path caused. She then sat back a little to say, "There was a lot more to me leaving you the way I did, but most of it was fear. There is a constant underlying worry in me that I will lose myself and what I've become." Sharon looked down at their interlocked fingers before looking into Andy's concerned eyes again to softly say, "I'm sorry, it's hard for me to give up being in control. I've spent most of my life fighting to be a strong independent woman. My fear stopped me from enjoying what was right in front of me for so long. Foremost, I was scared of giving away my heart and then repeating what happened with Jack. I didn't think I could survive through all that again, but I don't want to talk about that man right now."

"You'll get no argument from me about talking about your ex," Andy said jokily. "Now as for control, Sharon, I am all for letting you be in control. Trust me, it's a good thing," he gave her a lopsided smile then leaned in and kissed her. "What you are is what I love. That is a gorgeous, strong, independent and brilliantly smart woman. Though there are times you need to let go a little and just be."

Sharon listened to Andy talk, but it was hard for her to accept what he was saying. Memories of her life with her ex-husband crept into her head and she couldn't help but feel that dark cloud hovering over her again. She closed her eyes tight as she thought; Andy didn't deserve to be dealing with all her baggage and problems. Especially when most of them were in her head and there was no way he could help her through this. Sharon felt she was being selfish by not wanting to give Andy up, but maybe that's what would be fair to him in the long run. She would just end up hurting him again if she stayed.

Andy could see doubt fall over her beautiful face, so he took her chin in his hand and he watched her seriously saying, "look at me." When she didn't open her eyes, Andy said sternly, "Sharon, stop it. I can hear the wheels turning in your head, just look at me." As she finally slowly opened them he frowned to see a glint of tears pool in her saddened eyes. "I know I hurt you by not telling you what was going on with my health. I'm sorry about that and I do understand. I will be open and honest always. You need to stop over-thinking and know I honestly love you and I will always love you." Andy used the hand on her hip to pull Sharon in closer and kissed her slowly and passionately.

With his lips on hers, the dark thoughts were quickly gone. He always did know how to make her feel better. After a few smaller tender kisses, Sharon smiled against Andy's mouth and added, "What really set me right was that I got some wonderful advice from my know-it-all daughter." Sharon stood up, and with their still joined hands, gave Andy a soft tug to join her as she quietly admitted. "Emily's not so subtle advice reminded me it was my turn to dance." She couldn't help but smile again as Andy led them in a slow dance.

As they swayed side-to-side, Sharon asked concerned, "Do we have time before you have to be back at work? I don't want to give Captain Provenza another reason to call me an idiot, though it is nicer than some of his other nicknames." She didn't want to let Andy go so soon after just getting him back in her arms, but she knew he had to get back to the Murder Room.

Andy nuzzled her hair and whisper into her ear, "Yes, I have time. Don't worry about Louie, I just let him think he's in charge." He smirked as he said, "Though we didn't sleep much last night, I feel more rested than I have in months." Andy lifted his head from the side of her cheek to look Sharon in the eyes. "Can I ask one thing of you though?"

She was worried at the serious tone Andy's voice took. She nodded and answered, "of course."

"Can you promise me that when you start having doubts about me or us you'll talk to me and not just shut me out?" Andy was more concerned about her and wanted to make sure she wasn't always doing all the thinking in her head.

Sharon knew the promise was more for her than for him so she agreed, "I promise." Her reply was filled with emotions.

"Say it again." She happily repeated it and laughed as she remembered she always had her kids repeat things so she knew they understood and acknowledged what she was saying here.

They grew silent as they carefully stepped and glided around the furniture as they moved in small circles. He held her tight against him and their bodies moved as one. Sharon felt like she was dancing with her feet off the ground. When she was in Andy's arms, he had a way to make her feel like she was floating even when her feet were firmly planted on the ground. As he spun her out of his arms then dipped her, she laughed and her only thought was how grateful she was that Rusty had given them their space. She wasn't going to hold anything back anymore and as her youngest son pointed out earlier, the walls here weren't soundproof. She knew from the heat building up between them this was not going be quiet.

Leaning back into him with their entwined hands pressed in between their chests, Sharon shivered as Andy's mouth worked its way down her neck. Her "hmmm" encouraged his lips to work along her exposed shoulder moving their way lower into her crème cashmere sweater. She abruptly stood back, "ok that's it," she said breathlessly then pulled Andy towards her bedroom…no their bedroom.

Her movement was halted, as Andy didn't move. Sharon looked back over her shoulder, lifting an eyebrow in a questioning look. "I thought we were dancing?" Andy asked with a pout.

Sharon smiled knowingly, "and I thought we could finish this dance in our room." She didn't look back and this time when she tugged on their joined hands, she was met with no resistance.

Andy had a lopsided grin on his face as he caught onto what Sharon was saying. He willingly let the woman he planned on spending the rest of his life with lead him by the hand and the heart. As they entered their bedroom, he closed the door and leaned against it. He pulled her back to his chest and wrapped one arm around her waist. Sharon tilted her head to the side and moaned as Andy with his free hand threaded his fingers through her hair. After admiring the silky feeling, he then slid it over her shoulder and whispered in her ear, "I get this feeling that I can't explain. Every time I see your face or hear your name I just go crazy, thinking, this may be my chance." As Andy's hand on her waist made its way up higher along her rib cage, he asked, "What would you say to me if I said, let's lay down and dance?" He slid his tongue over the soft lobe of her ear, when he heard her let out a louder moan, he blew across the wet skin and felt her shiver. That, in turn, sent a shiver down his spine. "I got to tell you, Sharon you drive me wild. Every time I see you dance, I see that smile, my world gets hazy and I'm moving like I'm in a trance. I know it's crazy, but let's lay down and dance."

Sharon turned around and looked into Andy's deep dark brown eyes. The intense emotions she saw there caused her to gasp. She was sorry she ever doubted how much he truly cared for her. She could see all the desire, passion and love he felt staring back at her. She started raising up the t-shirt he was wearing, which happened to be the one she slept in the last few nights. Sharon didn't hold back any of her overflowing emotions as she softly said, "when it comes to love my heart is black and it's blue. I Swore I was through with romance, but Andy you're something and I'm counting on you. You're my brand new second chance."

He kissed her deeply; "You are my second chance too. Though my friends all told me that I'm not your kind. They say I better pray your love is blind. You got to save me; I'm a victim of your circumstance but let's lay down and dance." This time it was Andy pulling Sharon. They couldn't help but laugh as they tumbled on to the bed. It was his turn under her and to be delighted in taking his time remembering all his favorite spots of her body, which happened to be everywhere. Their lovemaking last night was almost frantic, for their need to just be together again. This morning they took their time, it was slow and steady.

When they were emotionally and physically sedated, Andy rolled to the side taking Sharon with him. When she laid her head on his chest, he held her close to his side and kept his hand on her hip. She automatically wrapped one of her legs around his. Comfortable, she softly whispered into the dark room, "Sooo down the street there's this house I've always admired and I noticed it's now up for sale."

Andy's eyes instantly popped open. With his arm around her, he pulled her tighter to him. "Sharon, what are you saying and if it's what I think it is, do you really mean it?"

"Yes, I mean it." Sharon lifted her head and looked at Andy. "I hope you dance...with me for the rest of our lives." His answer was a toe-curling, passionate kiss.

~The end~

So the song in this chapter is…  
~Let's Lay Down and Dance~  
Sung by: Garth Brooks  
Written by: Garth Brooks, Kent Blazy, Steve Dorff, Victoria Shaw and Kim Williams.


End file.
